Dave was boasting to his co-worker one day, saying, ‘You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just name someone. Anyone! And I know them.’ Tired of his bragging, his co-worker called his bluff, saying, ‘OK, Dave, how about Keanu Reeves?’ ‘Yep,’ Dave says. ‘Keanu and I are old friends, and I can prove it.’ The next day, Dave and his co-worker fly to Hollywood and go to Keanu Reeves’s door; Keanu comes out and shouts: ‘Dave! Sup man? Great to see you! Come on in for a beer!’
Although impressed, Dave’s co-worker is still skeptical. After they leave Keanu’s house, he tells Dave that he thinks his knowing Keanu was just lucky. ‘Name anyone else then,” Dave says, “and I’ll prove it again,’ ‘Fine,’ his co-worker says. ‘President Trump.’ ‘Yup,’ Dave says, ‘Old buddies, let’s fly out to Washington,’ and off they go. At the White House, Trump spots Dave on the tour and waves him and his co-worker over, saying, ‘Dave, what a surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let’s have a beer first to catch up.’ Well, the co-worker is very shaken by now but still not totally convinced.
After they leave the White House, the co-worker expresses his doubts to Dave, who again implores him to name anyone else. ‘Pope Francis,’ his co-worker replies. ‘Sure!’ says Dave. ‘I’ve known the Pope for years.’ So off they fly to Rome, where Dave and his co-worker stand with the assembled masses at the Vatican, looking up at the Pope on the balcony. ‘If you’re really friends with the Pope,’ the co-worker says, why are we out here with everyone else?’ Dave says, ‘If I could catch his eye, he’d bring us up, but there’s just too many people.’ The co-worker snorts, feeling vindicated, and says, ‘Sure.’ Then, in order to REALLY prove Dave wrong, he sneaks into the Vatican and onto the balcony, where he asks the Pope, ‘Do you know the guy 26 rows back and 19 in from the right?'”
After counting back and across, the Pope turns to the co-worker and says, ‘You mean the guy next to Dave?